Virgo

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True Fate

Virgo (24. 8.-23. 9.)

Career: Virgo, look out this month! Unemployment is looming. Not only will the stars not shine on you they will fall on your head! One morning on your way to work a bucket of mortar will tip off a tall ladder as you are passing a construction site. Although the street will be full with pedestrians you will be the only victim. It will crack open your skull, and you will be walloped into a comma. Worse still, your boss will dump you from the firm like a useless load of dirt. Love: Don’t worry Virgo! Everything will be Okay. Eventually you will come back to yourself. And better still, at that moment you will fall in love. Yes, you will fall instantly in love with the first person you see. Unfortunately the first person you see will not be the good looking nurse who had been changing your diapers every day for the past month -- this good looking nurse will call in sick that day. No, the first person that you see will be a substitute, a transvestite by the name of Candy. Money: Candy will take good care of you. You will hardly believe your luck. And only during your wedding night will it become clear to you what a terrible mistake indeed! At first you will be disgusted, beside yourself with regret; yet soon Candy will inform you that a rich uncle has died and now you will never have to worry about money again. Health: True, you will never have children, yet at the same time a long, healthy marriage is certain. Best of all, now Candy can get those operations, which before the inheritance was completely out of the question . . . Virgo! Forget what I suggested at the begging of this horoscope and you will live happily ever after.

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